This rocks ...

... I've not bought an ORIGINAL CD in YEARS, and this is the first one that I did - because of this song, and surprise, surprise, all the songs are pretty good. Who would've thought that was possible? :)



Love it!

The Simpsons!

I'm not erm ... an entirely huge fan of The Simpsons. I think Homer's an idiot and Marge is a doormat. Sure I'll probably incur the wrath and ire of loads of people, but to each his own ya? I'm not a fan, but I think that the art is really good though. :)

Online noodles ...

... welcome to the potential future 'raping' and disassembly of your mind, courtesy of fukinmeen.blogspot.com because trust me, if he's going to be honest with his opinions, a few of you guys and gals might need to erm ... well ... back up a little. He's nice and all that, but he's also a severely pissed off man when it comes to human idiots. :) Oh yeah ... and he's my brother :D

Lost it

Last Wednesday morning ... wow ... seems like a lifetime ago, I lost my head and issued expletives from my mouth that I've only ever heard of in TV and in my head. I said so many things in a very loud voice about David, because I couldn't say it TO David because he had just left through the front door. As usual, he didn't follow procedure and systems in place and I was livid. I stormed out of the office, and I reckon that people sorta knew that I was pissed off. Seriously. I've never been that upset in a long, long time and the office and Kuan and Pearly was calling me to see if I was ok whatever, I didn't answer their calls and PL had a chat with me about that later. Not that I cared. Right now, I KNOW that I chose to be upset, and it felt fantastic and I did that thing that Boss asked us to try out - don't try to shake a feeling off ... just go with the feeling and observe it, which I did and I calmed down faster than I would've normally. And my telling him how I felt about him and his lack of regard for systems in place, well let's just say that I surprised even myself by being calm and rational whilst talking to him.

Tiny Tin ...

Well, I have few friends, if any, in this world whom I treasure dearly. It takes a whole lot of something something for me to trust ANYONE these days, and I'm glad that I have the few friends that I do. Hartini's one of them. She's unlike any other girl I've met. She's caring, compassionate, insecure but strong at the same time. She's a lot of the times, a walking paradox. So this post is dedicated to the lady that calls me "Inspiron".

Tini, you have accomplished so much in life already, you need to take a step back from the picture, and see the whole painting. You're too focused on painting micro that you forget to see that every little micro thing that you do adds up to the macro picture of your life. Just like how right now, I don't see myself pursuing the issue with my Dad and the rest of the management, I know that it will work itself out one day. I needed to take a step back and know it. Refer to previous post - whilst still upset, I know that it will work out one day. It's all for a greater good, whatever it is.

Your life is filled with amazing people who care and love for you. People want you to succeed! We want to see you happy and in love with life like you always talk about. Think about those stars that were burning millions of light years away for you and Val to see. Think about the ocean crashing onto shore for your listening pleasure ... Allah made everything so that you might enjoy it. You are a beautiful, confident and strong lady - CLAIM IT! :)

Grey's Anatomy

This is by far one of my most favorite shows of all times. Of course, my life isn't as dramatic as the interns on GA, but I do have my moments.

Right now, after watching the new Season 3 episodes ... I think we're on Episode 10, and right now, I'm feeling like Miranda Bailey is about the injustice that The Chief let's Burke and Tina off the hook without any punishment.

All I've ever really had all this while was my work, and while I wasn't the best at it, I took pride in my work and made sure that I did it to the best of my abilities. I helped around in the office when I could and I made sure that I was a damned good team member to make sure that the team spirit burned on long into the night if that had to happen.

Then this whole fiasco with David and the stupid GSK order and how Esther had to make a big deal out of it, Jude yelling at me, Boss making it like my fault at the G10 meeting and making David the hero and all ... you know what ... I am sad, disappointed, let down, upset, indignant and angry. I'm not upset at David, but the at the fact that because he brings in the sales, he is treated like God. I AM NOT IN THE LEAST BIT JEALOUS OR ENVIOUS, let me remind you. I am used to Jerry being the apple of my parents eyes, I've had many years of adjusting and getting to used to that to not have that issue with David.

I'm sad ... because all I've ever had going right for me in my life, was my job and now, right now, at this moment, I can't bring myself to even find a flicker of joy or happiness in it, and I was always so happy at work. Previously, I would've been ecstatic and totally stoked about being nominated Employee Of The Year, simply because I figured that by being the MD's son, you are kinda taken out of the equation due to unfair bias input :P, but when my name was called, I was ... not in the least bit emotional about it. I called Mom, because I knew that it would make her day, I've never been the son who brought back awards or medals, that was Jerry's thing, and I'm happy that I helped make her day.

I don't know, not even the talk with Pearly made any difference. I just feel ... like all that's happening is that I'm being used, milked for all I'm worth under the guise of learning and grooming to take over the company. But ... right now, I don't want that. I want to be as far away as I can from that. I don't expect anyone to understand my state of mind, hell it took me years to accept me for who and what I am. I'm just sad and all I have is hope.


Hope.